FALLING IN LOVE...STAYING IN LOVE @ 50

HOMILY ON THE OCCASION OF THE 

50^th GOLDEN WEDDING ANNIVERSARY OF 

MR. AND MRS. ROMEO AND JESUSA PENAFLOR

What’s with the number 50?

Well, Genesis, which is the first book of the Bible, has 50 chapters. God also promised Abraham that he will not destroy Sodom and Gomorrah if Abraham can find 50 righteous people in that city. God also instructed ancient Israel that every 50^th year is a Jubilee year which means that all debts are cancelled and all properties are returned to their original owners. We have also to remember that 50 days after the Resurrection, Jesus sent the Holy Spirit to his disciples.

However, the number 50 is made more meaningful for us today because we remember  50 years ago, inside the Catholic Church of Mandurriao in Iloilo, before Fr. Agustin Espallardo, surrounded with their families and friends, Romeo and Jesusa, promised before the Lord to love one another in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, until death puts them apart

And now, we are gathered to join them in renewing today that promise of love made 50 years ago. And so, let us give our greetings to Mr. and Mrs. Romeo and Jesusa Penaflor through a round of applause.

I am very sure that after this Mass, there is that one popular question we would like to ask our celebrants: What is your secret? What is your secret to forever?

One time I saw this on Facebook: “Everybody knows how to fall in love, but only a few people know how to stay in love.” What it is saying is that everyone is born to love but not everyone can persevere in love. Why? Because not everyone understand, and practice, the real meaning of love.

St. Paul in our first reading today teaches us that love is not a mere feeling but a practice of virtues. And I know that Sir Romeo and Ma’am Jesusa will fully agree with me. You were able to reach fifty because for you love is not just a feeling but an everyday practice of the virtues of forgiveness, respect, understanding, care and concern. Love for you is active. Love for you is something which changes the person for the better. And so, Sir Romeo and Mam Jesusa, thank you for teaching us today how it is to truly, madly, and deeply love the other.

After this Golden Wedding liturgy, I will no longer tell you to take good care of your children. I will no longer admonish you Sir Romeo to love Jesusa your wife as Christ loves his Church. I will no longer remind you Ma’am Jesusa to be a loving housewife. I will no longer tell you those things, not because marriage expires after 50 years but because our celebration today is enough proof that you have been faithful and fruitful to the promises you made fifty years ago.

However, in our Gospel today, Jesus encourages each of us to be the salt of the earth and the light of the world. Simply said, Jesus is inviting us to be witnesses of his love in the world today. And this for me is your challenge Sir Romeo and Ma’am Jesusa – that you to continue to love one another in the next 50 years so that others, especially those who are planning to get married or those who are in difficult moments in their married life, will be able to draw inspiration from you; that seeing you, they will be able to say, naa gyud diay forever! This for me is your vocation starting today – that you show to the world that marriage is possible, that marriage is positive!

Rokcy and Ricky in the movie, Bride for Rent, once interviewed Lola Czarina and Lolo Banjamin who have been married for 51 years. There was only one question for the couple: “What is your secret in married life?”

Lolo Benjamin was silent, but Lola Czarina said, “Many told me that I can already leave my husband because he no longer remembers me. However, I cannot do it because I have a promise. I made a promise to have and to hold for richer or for poorer and in sickness and in health. Such promise for me is my secret, our secret.” 

A poem attributed to Fr. Pedro Arrupe, a Jesuit Priest, goes to say:

“Nothing is more practical than… falling in Love
in a quite absolute, final way.

It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning,
what you do with your evenings,
how you spend your weekends,
what you read, whom you know,
what breaks your heart,
and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.”

So, to Sir Romeo and Ma’am Jesusa, continue to “fall in love and stay in love” for it will decide everything! Amen!

THE JESUS' CHALLENGE

Twelfth Sunday in Ordinary Time

Father’s Day

Zec 12: 10-11; 13:1 / Ps 63 / Gal 3: 26 – 29 / Lk 9: 18 – 24

Every day in life, we face challenges. For students to wake up early to make it to school on time is an everyday challenge. For parents to adequately provide for the family is an everyday concern. For some, seeing their faces in front of the mirror is an eternal challenge, and I guess you know why…

But over and above these daily challenges is the challenge which Jesus proposes in our Gospel today. He said: “If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.”

These words are easy to memorize but have we asked ourselves if we are we ready to take up the challenge? We have to take note that prior to this challenge of Jesus, he asked his disciples about his identity: “Who do you say that I am?”

You see, Christian discipleship means (1) knowledge about who Jesus is and (2) responding to the challenge that this wonderful discipleship brings.

For this Sunday, we shall not reflect on the identity of Jesus. Let us rather reflect on our response to this call of discipleship: “SELF-DENIAL” and “TAKING UP THE CROSS DAILY.”

“Self-Denial”

It has been part of our human nature to “think only of self.” Every day, we accumulate things and even people all for ourselves: I have to get this cellphone because I need it bahala na ug inutang (never mind if it is on credit). I need you because I want your money, bahala ug bati ka ug nawong – pakaslan (never mind if you are ugly, I’ll marry you)!

The very first requirement of following Jesus is self-denial. Now, denying oneself does not mean hating or leaving the world. Rather, as John Paul II reminds us, denying oneself means accepting the reality that only Jesus can give us fullness of life; denying oneself means considering all that we have right now as gifts from the Good Lord. And as we do this, we become less of ourselves and closer to Jesus, Himself!

“Taking up the cross daily”

No one among you here would like to “take up your cross daily,” right? “Taking up our crosses daily” is not about experiencing pain in order to please God. It is not to suffer for suffering sake! Taking up one’s cross daily means to suffer because of love, and with love. John Paul II again reminds us that “love is the condition for following Him, but it is sacrifice that is the proof of that love.” What makes you a good disciple is not because you enjoy suffering. You are a good disciple because of your love despite the suffering.

A Barangay Captain who is at the same time the president of a church organization in her community shared to me her experience. Matod niya: “Padre, dili man gyud malikayan ang mga problema sa pamilya. Pero ang mas nakalisud kay bisag problema sa uban ako ng ipamahaw, ipaniudto, ug ipanihapon. Kung dili ni gugma dre, dugay rakong namatay!” (According to her: I cannot escape from the problems of family but what is more challenging is while attending to others, their problems have become part of my breakfast, lunch and dinner. If this is not about love, then I must have been dead a long time ago.) She said she has been used to this kind of life.

To me, that Barangay Captain is but one of the many Christians who have responded to the challenge Jesus presented more than two thousand years ago: ““If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.”

I am sure some of you here have tried the “ice bucket challenge,” or “the running man challenge,” or the “tatlong bibe challenge,” or the “trumpet challenge.”

But have you tried Jesus’ challenge? – Deny yourself and take up his cross daily! Amen.